Category Archives: Blog

Ketchup And Falling Planes

It’s often that we get so wrapped into ourselves and our everyday lives that it overshadows that which really matters. We become distracted, complacent and accustomed to the “daily routine”. Everything starts to be less relevant, an “I’ll do it later” occurrence, priorities are devalued, things are “not as” important anymore. Almost in no time, our surroundings and perception of things are either underrated or has diminished completely; we are unconcerned and jaded.

Just yesterday, I took a trip to the local market. There wasn’t anything imperative that I needed but I happen to be obsessed with shopping and taking casual excursions to grocery stores, as many other Americans; it’s a sickness. Anyhow, I frivolously strolled through the supermarket in circles as usual with no tactic or reason. It seemed purposely that I would always push this grocery cart all the way to one end of the store before discovering that I loosely forgot something on the opposite side. Time (not that I make the most of it anyhow) and energy were wasted but there it was; the ketchup and barbeque section.

I stood there, staring at the perfectly lined rows of ketchup with this cynosural look on my face as if I was house hunting. All thoughts had escaped me, except for my “fate determining” decision; this month’s choice of ketchup. This moment seemed to be “the big moment”! It was like I was there on stage being televised as the world waited patiently, biting nails and with crossed fingers as to which brand of pureed tomatoes I would choose. What a creep? There I was, stuck, with this mountain of a dilemma, should I continue to buy Heinz ketchup or try Annie’s Naturals. What about Del Monte or Hunt’s; haven’t heard much about those? Maybe the organic tomato ketchup would serve me well.

I mean, I really placed myself into what I thought at the time was a complicated situation deserving of fifteen whole minutes of my time, a loss of brain cells and ireful stares from fellow ketchup and barbecue shoppers for blocking their view.

All the while, bodies are still being recovered from the apparent collapsed missing aircraft, AirAsia; relatives have been waiting at the airport for days for love ones that will never return. A woman so blinded by a “potential rekindled love” is afraid to leave her progressing abusive relationship. Race riots protests are unraveling in numerous cities following the unfortunate and nonsensical deaths of young black men in America. Somewhere there’s a child that’s been bullied for so long that he’ll hang himself within the next hour (every seven minutes a child is bullied). There are people trying to figure out how bills are going to be paid after being laid-off. Everyone’s whipped into a frenzy and stocking up on hand-sanitizer, biohazard bags and gloves since news of Ebola has surfaced in the United States. What happens after the Cancer treatments are no longer working?

My most important decision of the day involved a condiment. I have to do better…







Before Sunset Movie Review and Quote

Before Sunset is the sequel of a trilogy and one of my favorite romantic films. It’s clever, eloquent and extremely charming. After a decade, an American author and French woman are coincidentally reconnected. They catch up on old times and converse about love, heartbreak, marriage and contradictions. It’s a must see.

Céline: I mean, I always feel like a freak because I’m never able to move on like (snaps her fingers) this! You know? People just have an affair or even…entire relationships…they break up and they forget! They move on like they would have changed brand of cereals! I feel I was never able to forget anyone I’ve been with. Because each person have…their own specific qualities. You can never replace anyone. What is lost is lost.

Each relationship when it ends really damages me; I never fully recover. That’s why I’m very careful with getting involved because…it hurts too much!. I guess when you’re young…you just believe there’ll be many people with whom you’ll connect with. Later in life you realize it only happens a few times.

You know, couples are so confused, uh lately. I think it must be that…men need to feel essential, and they don’t anymore. Because it’s been imprinted in their heads for so many years that they had to be the provider…like I, I’m a strong independent woman in my professional life. I don’t need a man to feed me but I still need a man to love me and that I could love, you know.

Jesse: Is that why you’re in a relationship with somebody who’s never around?

Céline: Yes, obviously, I can’t deal with the day to day life of a relationship. Yeah, we have, you know, this exciting time together and then he leaves, and I miss him, but at least I’m not dying inside. When someone is always around me, I’m like suffocating!

Jesse: No, wait, you just said that you need to love and be loved…

Céline: Yeah, but when I do it quickly makes me nauseous! It’s a disaster… I mean I’m really happy only when I’m on my own. Even being alone…it’s better than…sitting next to a lover and feeling lonely. It’s not so easy for me to be all romantic. You start off that way and after you’ve been screwed over a few times…you…you…you forget about all your delusional ideas and you just take what comes into your life. That’s not even true I haven’t been…screwed over, I’ve just had too many blah relationships. They weren’t mean, they cared for me, but… there were no real…connection or excitement. At least not from my side.

Jesse: God, I’m sorry, is it…is it really that bad? It’s not, right?

Céline: You know what? Reality and love are almost contradictory for me. It’s funny…every single of my ex’s…they’re now married! Men go out with me, we break up, and then they get married!

You know, I want to KILL them!! Why didn’t they ask ME to marry them? I would have said “No”, but at least they could have asked!! But it’s my fault, I know it’s my fault, because…I never felt it was the right man. Never! But what does it mean the right man? The love of your life? The concept is absurd; the idea that we can only be complete with another person is…EVIL!! RIGHT??!!

You know, I guess I’ve been heartbroken too many times. And then I recovered. So now, you know, from the starts I make no effort…because I know it’s not going to work out, I know it’s not going to work out.

I’m so miserable in my love life, in my relationship, I always act as… like…you know, I’m detached, but I’m… I’m dying inside. I’m dying because I’m so numb. I don’t feel pain, or excitement. I’m not even bitter, I’m just…uh…




Do you ever just feel like running away from everything? Sometimes I just want to gather everything that will fit into a duffle bag and just hitting the road; not telling anyone…just leaving. I wouldn’t inform my disinterested family or my dead-end job or my preoccupied friends or even my inattentive boyfriend…I would just leave.

Then I ask myself, would anything change? Will I completely be unchained?


Carpe Diem

Whomever said “live everyday as if it were your last” definitely has a death wish. If I lived everyday as if it were my last or aligned my lifestyle with this “YOLO” cliché, I wouldn’t get anything done…and I’m pretty certain I’d have aids…

Don’t judge me for my honesty. I speak the things you’re afraid to expose.